How to Take the Sting Out of Rejection

One of the essential factors in increasing your sales success is the ability to effectively deal with rejection.  Let’s face it, no one likes to be rejected.  Unfortunately, however, the possiblity of rejection comes with the territory whenever you are making any kind of offer.

This is especially true when you’re selling highly valuable services.  You are not going to turn everyone into a paying client no matter how good your services are or how skillful you are at selling your services.  You are going to hear the word “no” and experience rejection at some point.  If you’ve been in business any amount of time at all, you likely have experienced rejection more times than you would care to remember. 

For service-based, mission-centered women entrepreneurs, rejection really stings.  It can be really hard not to take it personally when someone rejects your offer.  I’ve seen so many women entrepreneurs who struggle with picking up the phone and following up with leads and prospects because they have such a strong fear of rejection.  In the moment, it feels so much easier to put off picking up the “100 lb.” phone in order to avoid rejection.

The problem with employing the avoidant approach to rejection, is that it keeps you from growing your business and serving the people you are meant to serve.

So what can you do to effectively manage your fear of being rejected?

Here are 3 tips to take the sting out of rejection so you can sell like the bold and fiery woman entrepreneur you truly are:

1. Get a grip on the numbers.  While there is an art and a science to selling, there is also simple math.  You are never going to convert 100% of the people you make an offer to (unless your offer is actually paying people to work with you).  Like I said, you are going to hear “no” at some point.  In fact, you are probably going to hear “no” quite a bit before you hear “yes.” Learn what your conversion rate is, if you don’t know it already.  For instance, if your conversion rate is 30%, you know you can expect to hear 7 “no’s” out of 10.  This awareness keeps you from feeling sucker-punched when you hear those 7 no’s. Plus, once you know your conversion rate, you can work on improving it, rather than just beating yourself up.

2. Reframe the rejection. One of the reasons that we all fear rejection is because we think we are being rejected. Let me explain.  Just because someone says, “no” does not mean they are rejecting you.  It really is about them.  They could have 100 things going on that are impacting their decision.  And let’s be real, your services are not a good fit for everyone, and not everyone is an ideal client for you.  Selling is all about seeing if there is a match between your prospect’s needs and your offer.  There really never is any rejection, only a mismatch.  If you’re hearing “no” a lot, look for where the mismatch is occuring and make the necessary changes to rectify the situation.

3. Be committed but not attached.  Be committed to serving your potential client and helping them achieve the change they desire, but don’t be attached to the outcome.  As the saying goes, “There are more fish in the sea.” Don’t feel like you must gain any particular client.  And remember, selling is all about helping your prospect make the best decision for them, not convincing them to do business with you.  Be committed to doing what it takes to help them make a sound decision and once that decision is made, trust that it is the right decision, at least at that particular time. Besides, a “no” today could be a “yes” tomorrow, if you stay committed to service and follow-up like a BrightFire Woman would. :-)

Practice these tips and you will see your fear of rejection begin to diminish.  I’d love to hear how you build up your sales resilience, so be sure to leave a comment below.

If you know you need help with creating more sales and serving more people, click here to sign up for your Complimentary Profits and Impact Session.

About Tiffany deSilva

Tiffany deSilva is the founder, CEO, and visionary leader of BrightFire Women’s Business Network, LLC.

BrightFire Women’s Business Network is the premiere sales training and coaching resource for service-based women entrepreneurs who want to increase their sales, serve more people, and change more lives.

Feedback & Comments:

  1. Tiffany, these are excellent tips. I think all of us has that little voice inside that fears rejection however you are so right. Sometimes a no can lead to a yes later on. My father used to say a no gets us that much closer to a yes!

  2. So true! All of it!! I especially like “committed but not attached.” As you say, we don’t know what’s going on in another person’s life. (We sometimes can’t entirely understand what it happening in our own!)

    Love, Katherine

    Author, Be True Rich

  3. I agree, this is part of business and not to be taken personally. I really like this “selling is all about helping your prospect make the best decision for them, not convincing them to do business with you”
    Thanks!

  4. Great tips for pushing through rejection. For some people it gets easier, for others it doesn’t, but it’s part of the process. Having these tools to work through it, is extremely helpful.

  5. These are great tips – if you as a biz owner can’t reframe rejection, I honestly don’t think you will last in business.

  6. Heidi Alexandra Pollard says:

    Love the concept of sales resilience it is really what it is always about – no doesn’t always mean yes and it is just part of the process.

  7. Attachment to the outcome is what really works against you. Wanting it to workand being attached are very different.

  8. Good tips on rejection. Consider every single ‘no’ another step closer to a ‘yes’.

  9. Being committed without being overly attached is so important. Over the years I’ve learned that it is not helpful for my clients or for me if I work harder at their goals than they do.

    Great article.

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